Hers. That’s what I call Being Her Now.
This is Hers. Her Space. Your space. Our space. A Woman’s place. A place to explore the wild woman within, no matter who you are or where you’re coming from, as long as you are brave enough to open and explore your Feminine Side…. and maybe even your Wild Side.
What this is: a place to encourage, empower, accept, celebrate, open, expand, go deeper, go higher, and grow.
What this is not: a place to judge, criticize, condemn, close or in any way negate another. Life is hard enough. We’ve all got enough of the negative stuff. Leave your ego at the door. There’s no place for that here.
Be her now.
A while back, I tattooed that phrase on my lower leg. Myself. Yes, stick and poke. And yes, I was turning fifty. My husband tells me he read that if you haven’t grown up by sixty, you don’t have to. He’s off the hook. I’m getting there.
Grown up. Who defines grown up? See, I used to define it like the stiff and dull frumps with boring lives who hate their jobs and wear sensible shoes. And if that was grown up, I wasn’t interested in going there.
What I’d like to encourage the new “grown up” to be is something totally different than that. It’s about being strong, clear, wise, wild and wonderful. It’s about becoming who we wish to become, and being the best person we can be. It’s about being responsible and commited, yes, but to those things that serve our highest good, and the highest good of all, not simply selfish or shallow goals about manifestation, success and achievement. We’re talking inside stuff here. That’s the real meat-and-potatoes of life, anyway.
There is a part of growing up that I am working towards. I am coming to believe it’s a lifelong journey. See, it’s about growing. Evolving. Expanding. This is what I define as growing up, and this is the journey I’m sharing here and now. Maybe you’re The Mother. Maybe you’re The Matriarch. Maybe you’re still the Maiden, or even beyond and have become The Crone. Whatever cycle within the Woman’s life you may be, may you be awakening, evolving, learning, opening, expanding… Growing up.
So, this site is about growing up, but not in the usual way.
Think of a rose coming to bloom, or even beyond to a bright red hip. There’s nothing boring there, is there?
I’m not here to tell you what to do. You are your own guru.
Once upon a time, I was a nature writer. Quiet, private, simple… just sharing the view I saw when I’d stepped outside my back door.
And then something happened.
Maybe it was Menopause.
Maybe it was something greater.
In any case, it was a pretty painful and powerful process that left me looking at myself and the world around me differently. And would you believe: more beautifully.
So that’s what I write about now.
It’s not what I had set out to do…
Here’s how it started.
Wild Mountain Matrona began from my midwifery and doula work with a growing collection of thoughtful articles, and special one-on-one online and/or hands-on WildBirth/Childbirth Preparation Workshops and services to support and honor the pregnant woman; her body, her birth, her baby, her choices and her soul. It was (and still is) about Being with Women. Supporting women in discovering their own ways through the childbirth continuum.
Only now, we’re going further, deeper and well beyond. We’re moving from The Mother to The Matriarch. An expansive, exploratory journey of body, mind and soul for women to educate, empower, awaken and enjoy, no matter in which stage of the Moon they may be.
This website started as a way of empowering the Mother.
Then there was Menopause, and everything changed.
I took some time away from nature writing to explore this change, because it fascinated me, and I found nothing else out there to share the insight and support I wanted. Well, if you can find it, make it.
After two years of working on a manuscript on Menopause, I finally opened up, just a tiny crack, and exposed myself – and the manuscript – with my writing mentor.
Start a blog, she told me.
We talked. On one hand she was right. Continuing from the Wild Mountain Matrona/Be Her Now and Whole Woman perspective for the pregnant woman made more sense than I initially understood. So many of the same principles hold true, primarily that philosophy of knowing and nurturing the Whole You. So though Pregnancy/Birth and Menopause seem so far apart, they are both Rites of Passage for the Woman’s Life, Blood Rites, Sacred Transformations of the Feminine Spirit. And for both, the Spirit of Woman remains the same.
On the other hand: No, not again! After feeling so exposed to the point of over-exposure with my previous blog, from which my first two books were born, I quit. I hated it. I felt I was selling myself. I had violated my core principles about privacy and self respect. I was left feeling like a pile of jello without a plate.
So, I’m playing it safer here. I’ll try to keep the personal stuff out. That’s hard, you know. Stories matter. They make more sense than, say, lectures.
We’ll see how it goes.
Here’s what it’s all about.
At some points in our lives, usually during Rites of Passage and Sacred Transformations, we may be challenged to look at truth, within and around us. The truth may be a little different for each of us, but for all of us, the process of finding the way is not always easy, often somewhat painful, frustrating, and frightening. Such is the process of awakening or becoming. It is expansive, and in the course of expanding, we are often left with uncertain boundaries and in the confusing state of seeing how much we do not know. At some point, the bottom drops out, and we are left to… fall or fly. And then, in that ethereal state, when all else has been stripped away, deep down within our souls, in the dark corners we may not have dared look before,that is where the work is done. There is where we find our wisdom, the answers, our true self.
The more healed, whole and understanding we become, the more healing, wholeness and understanding we can give. This is the greatest gift. For ourselves and thus for others.
It is from this deep, open place within us that we become true Women, able to give the most, and base our giving upon truth, compassion, bravery, and love. Because it is in our heart and soul, not because we are told or required or it is demanded of us.
With Midwifery, Doula work, Yoga practice and teaching, and mentoring, I am honored and grateful to be a part of a community embracing and receiving truth, and having the opportunity to serve others with an strong will and soft heart. Becoming empowered in a positive light is a political act. Whether we wish it to be or not, all of us following this calling will at times be up against the conforming, controlling majority, and will be labeled the trouble maker, risk taker, black sheep, and of course, the witch. Almost amusingly when you see the irony, we may be called ignorant and irresponsible, though our knowledge and understanding may be far greater and deeper than those pointing fingers. Most of us will not have to endure the conflict and resolution that our sister before us may have, but all of us will have our challenges, our story.
May we be strong enough to hold up our Sisters when they lean; soft enough to know when we need to lean.
May we work together towards the highest good of all.
That’s a lofty goal, no doubt.
But we won’t get any closer to it if we don’t start now.
Be her now!
About the Be Her Now Blog
With the articles created and shared herein, it is that unique, self directed woman I have had in mind to serve. I have held her in my heart and tried to understand what I could give that would be of benefit. I have reviewed the huge ocean of information and ideas I have only begun navigating through intense education, contemplation, reflection and research. I have questioned my knowledge and belief system, tried to keep myself in check, rather than imposing it upon women. And I have tried to remain positive. There’s enough negative out there. Focusing on the would/could/should stuff isn’t my thing.
What is my thing? Empowering the self directed woman to explore while remaining safe and sound and balanced. Connecting with the whole self. Encouraging self knowledge and self nurturing. Enjoying as fully as one can this Sacred Transformation.
I’m not here to teach you about becoming. I’m here to be with you and encourage you as you explore and discover becoming whatever you are called to be. I’m a companion, nothing more.
Of course we cannot be all things to all women. Shall we try to appeal to the masses, or shall we honor our uniqueness and do our best to clearly see our limitations and best serve within them?
This is who I am.
So, however much I try to keep myself out, this is personal. And I want to keep it that way. Because life is personal. Let’s not be afraid to open up, share, and expose our greatest truths. Let us create a safe place where all our Sisters, and those honoring their Sisterhood within them, may awaken and enlighten and celebrate their becoming.
Be brave enough to stand out and speak up for what deeply matters, even if you don’t think anyone is listening. Maybe they are.
Be compassionate – especially to yourself.
Be open – we cannot connect nor receive if we are closed.
Be bold enough to dream, strong enough to commit, determined enough to try, passionate enough to give your all, creative enough to believe, courageous enough to keep trying, vulnerable enough to be willing to fail, to lose, to fall… and stubborn enough to get back up and try again.
This is about being, becoming, believing, belonging.
Be her now.